Dear Reader!,

Welcome to November!

I'm looking forward to a slighly less hectic month - October was so full and so busy it just flew by.

The month ended with a three day global conference for Coaches in Washington, D.C. I was honored to speak on behalf of the DEIB Department at ICF (International Coaching Federation).

I also co-presented a presentation called "Coaching Across Differences: Building Trust With Authenticity." The class was well attended and went so well that my own current teachers used some of what I said in their current class!

Between officiating my nephew's wedding and presenting in D.C. I am full of gratitude - which is a great way to start the month of thankfulness!

What are you thankful for today?

New Blog Post: The ADHD Snowball Effect: One Hard Thing Becomes Seven

You just need to pay the electric bill.

Should take about five minutes, right?

Except first you have to find the bill and can't. So then you try to log in to the account on line and can't remember your password. (again) You reset it.

Then you realize there's not enough money in your account to pay the bill. So you start investigating why. Half an hour later you've dug through a pile of papers, found three other things you need to do, and are now wondering how you've managed to survive this long as an adult.

And the bill is still unpaid.

Welcome to the ADHD snowball effect, where one relatively simple tasks somehow becomes seven (or more) other tasks, a minor meltdown, and possibly a new hobby you didn't mean to start.

Read The Blog Here

Things That Make “Just Be Yourself” Terrible Advice

1. Being Yourself Isn't Always Safe. Let's not pretend everyone can show up exactly as they are without consequences. You don't owe anyone authenticity at the expense of your safety.
2. Some of Us Have Been Masking for Decades. When you've spent most of your life trying to be who everyone else expects you to be, figuring out who you actually are takes time. It's not like there's a switch you can flip.
3. It's Not All or Nothing. You can be completely yourself with some people and more guarded with others. That doesn't make you fake. It makes you someone who gets to decide what parts of yourself you share and with whom.
4. Maybe the Problem Isn't the Person. We spend a lot of time telling people to be themselves and not nearly enough time making sure they have spaces where they can actually do that.
5. Being Different Can Be Exhausting. Constantly explaining yourself, correcting assumptions, or advocating for what you need takes energy. Sometimes you just want to exist without having to give a TED Talk about why you're you.
6. It's Just Another Damn Expectation. Be yourself! But not too much. Be authentic! But make sure everyone is comfortable with it. Seriously, can we stop making authenticity another thing people have to get right?

Closing Thought: Maybe instead of telling people to “just be themselves,” we should spend more time creating spaces where they actually feel safe enough to do that.

Gentle Reflection Question If you could walk away from a coaching session feeling more confident about something in your life, what would that be?

What's Kat Up To?

Free Resource: Your Super Serious ADHD User Manual A fun little personalized user manual for your ADHD Brain

🌻 1:1 Individual Coaching ​Find Out More →​

🌻 Text-Based Coaching ​Find Out More→​

🌻 Free Community of Belonging ​Join Today →​

That's it from me this week my friend. This is your reminder to be your own kind of beautiful. Don't compare yourself to others. You are amazing, exactly as you are.